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Wednesday, April 12, 2006
Can you?
Have you ever felt guilty for not being able to help someone?
Well, not trying to be Miss Helpful here..
But, I just cant stand myself when I cant offer help to others when they needed..
Even if I cant offer direct help, I will still find ways and means to do so..
And because of this, it is also quite hard to reject pple when they need help..
And because of this, I took it about myself when help is not offered..
Can you imagine, having sleepless night because of sth that you are supposed to help pple in..
Can you imagine, have nightmares because of the stress from the help you were supposed to give..
Can you imagine, there is someone so stupid to let "the offerings of help" gets into her and affect her normal lifestyle..
Can you imagine..
For the past few days, I've been so stressed out with the "help" I was supposed to offer..
Cause I dunch know how to "help" and I dunch know where to squeeze out time to "help"
Not that I didnt want to "help", but how to when I'm already having schedule packed so tight, that no air can even escape from my asshole..
Can you imagine..
After declining to "help", I still have to cope with the "After-Stress"..
Worried about whether by declining, the person is able to cope..
Worried about whether by declining, the person is going to be pissed..
Guess, it all about trust bah..
Guess, its being too sensitive..
Guess, I'm being super silly..
Guess, I'm thinking too much..
Guess, I'm worrying too much..
Cant imagine I am letting this affects me..
Cant imagine I am feeling guilty..
Cant imagine I am this lousy..
No wonder I'm always stuck in this kingdom..
Its not easy for me to trust..
Its not easy to love yourself.. without being selfish..
Nvm..
Lets just,
Blame time for being so stingy..
Blame virus for attacking me..
Blame myself for being weak..
Okie, shld feel better..
posted by Elephant on 10:00 PM
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